A chubby girl, sitting on the floor, faithfully draws a map of the Magic Land with a path of amber bricks ... It's me. I still draw it - a map of my inner world. The amount of curiosity within us is inexhaustible. I have an almost bodily perception of a total connection between all physical bodies, energies; there is a sense of the continuity of vital matter. From organic forms, projections of various objects and random insights, I am trying to build a space of experiences, doubts, prohibitions, blocks and subconscious reactions.
For me, the creative process is not an aesthetic act, but an exploration. I was looking for my own way of reconstructing the spiritual body. For many years I have been using two creative methods, which I would call after Wassily Kandinsky "impressions" and "improvisation". I love to work from nature, allowing myself some freedom from having to literally document what I see, yet my presence on the spot at the moment remains of great importance. Wassily Kandinsky in his work “On the Spiritual in Art” calls these states “impressions”.
I am inspired by the texture and energy of the human body, its gracefulness and the pulsation of biological form. At such a moment, I work under the impression of momentary emotions, trusting the gesture, mood, sense of color. The second approach is psychological immersion, where I immerse myself in my intuitive, allowing my hand to follow the spontaneous and visualize it. Kandinsky defines this method as "improvisation". The bizarre interaction of social stereotypes, patterns of behavior and natural reactions in the depths of the human subconscious remains a mystery to me.
Where is the real me? How much "white" and how much "black" is in my mind? What is the dark side of my nature? How to distinguish my true nature from the product of upbringing, the traditions of my family, society, era? Maybe this "black" side is not as terrible as it is commonly believed, but, on the contrary, the most valuable le noir gilding, the most precious gift, and this "white" can not be mistaken for my identity at all, but hardly as a matrix, a cast created by the social system?
In my creative practice, I work on solving this problem primarily for myself, using various techniques and materials. Even working in the open air, I try to learn about the internal, hidden structure of the surrounding space ...